Two Households, Organized in Dignity: Merging Homes

So, after many months of planning—and plenty of false starts, false hopes, and anxiously applied false eyelashes—the wedding bells (or the dizzying number of comment “notifications” on Facebook after you’ve finally made your relationship status official) have at last finished ringing. You’ve finally stopped picking stray grains of rice from out of your hair, you’ve recycled all the cans that your best man left clattering behind your car, and you’ve unpacked all of your wedding gifts. You’ve gotten hitched with nary a hitch, and you’re ready for some well-earned peace, quiet, and relative-free serenity.

The honeymoon’s over, and you and your partner are now headed home. After all of the hard work and preparation, the “thank you” cards and the fittings, you’re both prepared to complete your relationship pièce de résistance: moving in together. But—as the two of you move into your new place—which of your combined household items should be moving out? Read on for some tips that’ll keep the integration of your two households from unraveling like the bloody end of a Shakespearean tragedy. 

To Thine Own Selves Be True

• Review your “shared” items before you move in together, and donate or ditch the rest. Look, do you really need two toasters? Two waffle makers? Four different French Presses or instant coffee makers? No, because no one does. Think of the move as an opportunity to not only consolidate your items but as a chance to reorganize and prioritize your lives. Don’t think of it as “losing” a toaster; think of it as “gaining” some space on your countertop.

• Look at how much space you’re going to need as you move in. Prioritize harmony over items. That neon sign in the living room might’ve fit in well at your bachelor pad, but aesthetics change when we start living in a shared space. You don’t necessarily have to give away an item that you love, but it might be more convenient to keep in a storage unit until you upgrade to a bigger space with a den.

• Overall, let your current space be the deciding factor on what stays and what goes; don’t let your choices get too emotional or heated. Start off on the right foot, and let what fits, sit. It’s not that you don’t love their 

• If you’re merging your pet family, too, make sure that your pets have had plenty of play-dates before the big move. Don’t let your partner’s dog turn your cat into just a “memory.” 

All’s Well That Ends Well

Remember that investing in self-storage does not mean that you’re saving items “in case something doesn’t work out.” Clarify with each other that you respect each other enough to care about the items that are important to both of you. You’re prioritizing your new shared living space to make room for one another, and still safely securing the items that are meaningful to the both of you.